You go to church alone. Maybe with the children, maybe by yourself, and either way you sit down in that row and you feel the empty space beside you more than you hear the sermon.
God sees that seat, and He has not asked you to fix your husband. Philippians 1:6 says that He who began a good work will carry it on to completion, and that promise covers the man you married even when you cannot see any movement in him at all.
These 50 gentle prayer points for a husband who will not go to church come with Bible verses attached, so you are standing on the Word and not on your own confidence.
Praying Without Turning It Into Pressure
There is a difference between praying for your husband and praying at him. One softens you, the other hardens him. 1 Peter 3:1 is honest about which works: a husband is won over without words by what he sees in his wife, not by the argument she wins on the drive home.
So these prayers are written to be prayed in private, not read out at the kitchen table. Most of them ask God to change something in him. Several of them ask Him to change something in you, because bitterness is the one thing that will shut this door faster than his absence ever could.
Bible Verses For A Husband Who Will Not Go To Church
Read these first. On the Sundays when you have no words left, these six will carry you.
Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives. 1 Peter 3:1-2
For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. 1 Corinthians 7:14
I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. Ezekiel 36:26
Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6
Not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10:25
“But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.” Joshua 24:15
What to do when your husband won’t go to church with you?
You pray before you push. These ten are where to start.
1. Soften his heart. Father, take the stone out of my husband’s heart and give him a heart of flesh that can feel You again. Ezekiel 36:26
2. Show me what is underneath. Father, help me understand what is really keeping him away, whether it is hurt, shame, tiredness or something he has never said. Proverbs 20:5
3. Heal what the church did to him. Father, if he was wounded by people in Your house, heal that wound and do not let it keep him out forever. Psalm 147:3
4. Remove my nagging. Father, take the pressure out of my voice. Let him hear love from me and conviction from You. Proverbs 21:9
5. Let him see Christ in me. Father, let the way I live be the sermon he cannot walk out of. 1 Peter 3:1-2
6. Send him a man he respects. Father, place a godly man in his life whose faith he can admire without feeling judged. Proverbs 27:17
7. Guard our Sunday mornings. Father, keep peace in this house on Sunday mornings, whatever he decides to do. Romans 12:18
8. Keep me from comparing. Father, stop me from measuring my marriage against the couples I see walking in together. Galatians 6:4
9. Hold my faith steady. Father, do not let my own walk with You depend on whether he comes with me. Hebrews 10:25
10. Give me patience for the long wait. Father, this may take years. Give me the kind of patience that does not keep score. James 1:4
Prayer Points For Your Own Heart On Sunday Morning
This section is for you. Pray it honestly, even the parts you would rather not admit.
11. Take the resentment out. Father, I am tired of walking in alone. Take the resentment before it settles into something permanent. Ephesians 4:31
12. Forgive me for the hard words. Father, forgive the things I have said about his faith in frustration. Psalm 141:3
13. Let worship still reach me. Father, do not let the empty seat beside me stop me from meeting You today. Psalm 42:5
14. Protect me from self-righteousness. Father, keep me from thinking I am the spiritual one in this marriage. Luke 18:11-14
15. Give me friends who pray. Father, surround me with women who will carry this with me instead of gossiping about it. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
16. Keep my hope alive. Father, when nothing has changed for years, keep hope from dying quietly in me. Romans 15:13
17. Let me still respect him. Father, help me honor my husband in the areas where he is faithful, and not define him by this one thing. Ephesians 5:33
18. Stop me from manipulating. Father, I do not want to guilt him into the pew. Let his coming be real or not at all. 2 Corinthians 4:2
19. Settle my fear for him. Father, I am afraid for his soul. I bring that fear to You instead of carrying it alone. 1 Peter 5:7
20. Make me gentle. Father, let gentleness be the thing he notices most in me this week. Galatians 5:22-23
How to pray for your unbelieving husband?
Not every man who skips church is unsaved, but if that is your situation, pray these. Our fuller set of prayer points for an unbelieving husband goes further on salvation specifically.
21. Open his eyes. Father, lift the veil off my husband’s understanding so he can see who You really are. 2 Corinthians 4:4
22. Draw him Yourself. Father, no one comes unless You draw them. Draw my husband in a way only You can. John 6:44
23. Send him Your word. Father, let Your word reach him through a song, a conversation, a message he was not looking for. Isaiah 55:11
24. Sanctify this home. Father, Your word says this house is set apart because of my faith. Let that covering hold over him. 1 Corinthians 7:14
25. Break what is blinding him. Father, break every stronghold of pride, past hurt or indifference that stands between him and You. 2 Corinthians 10:4
26. Make him restless for You. Father, give him a holy restlessness that success and comfort cannot satisfy. Ecclesiastes 3:11
27. Remove the wrong voices. Father, move away every friendship that keeps him comfortable in his distance from You. 1 Corinthians 15:33
28. Answer his unspoken questions. Father, there are things he will not ask out loud. Answer them anyway. Jeremiah 33:3
29. Save him in his own time. Father, I release the timetable to You. Save him in Your way and in Your hour. Ecclesiastes 3:1
30. Let me live to see it. Father, I ask boldly: let me be there on the day he walks in on his own. Psalm 27:13
Prayer Points For Your Children While You Wait
They are watching both of you. Cover them while this is unresolved.
31. Protect their faith. Father, do not let my children conclude that church is only for mothers. Proverbs 22:6
32. Guard their questions. Father, give me honest answers when they ask why their father stays home. Colossians 4:6
33. Keep them loving him. Father, let nothing I say turn my children against their father. Exodus 20:12
34. Give them spiritual fathers. Father, send godly men into their lives who will show them what faith looks like in a man. Titus 2:2
35. Make our home peaceful. Father, let this house be a place of peace, not a place of quiet tension on a Sunday. Psalm 133:1
36. Let them see me pray. Father, let my children grow up knowing their mother prayed, even when she prayed alone. 2 Timothy 1:5
37. Hold the family altar. Father, help me keep prayer alive in this house even without his agreement. Joshua 24:15
38. Shield them from shame. Father, let no one at church make my children feel different because their father is not there. Psalm 34:5
39. Save the whole household. Father, I stand on Your promise for my household, and I will not shrink it to fit what I can see. Acts 16:31
40. Let them be the reason. Father, if it takes his children to bring him back, let You use them gently. Isaiah 11:6
Prayer Points For The Day He Walks Back In
Pray for the return before it happens, and pray for what comes after it.
41. Prepare the welcome. Father, prepare our church family to receive him warmly and without comment on how long it took. Luke 15:20
42. Remove his embarrassment. Father, take away the shame of walking in after years away. Isaiah 61:7
43. Give him a reason to stay. Father, let him find something there that is for him and not only for me. Psalm 34:8
44. Keep me from saying I told you so. Father, guard my mouth on that day above every other day. Proverbs 17:28
45. Make him a leader, not a guest. Father, grow him into the spiritual head of this home in Your own time. Ephesians 5:25
46. Restore our years. Father, repay us for the seasons we spent apart in this. Joel 2:25
47. Let us pray together. Father, I am asking for the day we pray out loud together in this house. Matthew 18:19
48. Guard him after the decision. Father, protect his new faith from discouragement in the first year. 1 Peter 5:8
49. Use our story. Father, let our marriage become an encouragement to another woman sitting in a row by herself. 2 Corinthians 1:4
50. Thank You in advance. Father, I thank You for what You are doing in my husband that I cannot see yet. Philippians 1:6
How To Pray These Prayer Points
Pray them where he will not hear you. This is not a performance for his benefit, and a prayer he overhears will land on him as criticism no matter how carefully you worded it. Early morning or the drive to work is enough.
Pick five or six and pray those every day for a month rather than running the whole list once. And watch yourself as much as you watch him. The points in the second section are there because the woman praying is usually carrying more than she admits, and God wants to deal with that too.
Read also: 50 Loving Prayer Points For My Husband To Be A Spiritual Leader
Frequently Asked Questions
When your husband doesn’t want to go to church?
Go without him and keep the morning peaceful. Do not make his decision a weekly argument, and do not stop attending yourself to keep the peace. Hebrews 10:25 is written to you as much as to him, and your steady presence will say more over five years than any Sunday morning debate.
What is a good prayer for an unbelieving husband?
Father, lift the veil off my husband’s understanding, draw him to Yourself in a way only You can, and let my life be the thing that makes You believable to him. Points 21 to 30 above expand that into a full set.
What does God say about an unbelieving spouse?
Paul deals with this directly. 1 Corinthians 7:14 says the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his believing wife, and verse 16 asks how you know whether you will save your husband. Read 1 Corinthians 7:12-16 in full. It is a word of hope, not a word of pressure.
What are some good prayer points for my husband?
Start with his heart rather than his habits. Points 1 to 10 cover that: a softened heart, healing for whatever the church did to him, and the removal of pressure from your own voice.
What is a good prayer for someone who is unsaved?
Ask God to draw them, since John 6:44 says no one comes otherwise. Then ask Him to remove whatever is blinding them and to send His word to them through a route you did not arrange. Points 21 to 23 are written exactly that way.
You are not praying into nothing. If the distance in your marriage goes wider than church, our prayer points for a distant husband and our prayer points for patience with my husband will help. If there is something still unforgiven between you, start with our prayer points to forgive my spouse, and when you are ready to talk about it with him, our prayer points before a difficult marriage conversation are written for that evening. Keep going to church, and keep praying.